Today is Wednesday, am not sure i knew how it would turn out neither did i care. All i care about is i die happy and content. I live like no one had expectations from me because this expectations take me from myself. I still listen to trippy music just as i still go to church. Am confused most will say. This new confusion makes me happy unlike previously where i was overconfident and lived to peoples expectations and still didn’t satisfy them. Sadder i got and depressed.
I single handedly killed all the small gods i had made, all the moms i had made to replace my mom, all the siblings i created to make me not feel lonely. I had to face that ghost by myself. I figured it was stupid of me. I don’t expect anything from anyone, however i don’t mind surprises. Its living life like i should have. I still fall in love and out of love only now that i don’t share with just anyone. You ask why? we human beings are fucked up and i’ve learnt that the hard way.
I’ve found love in strangers and they ended up being the greatest friends and confidants i could ever have. Even if it was for two or three hours. I’ve learnt that in life you have to let go of the page you’ve read so that you can open up a new one. When you open a new one the story becomes really interesting and you just cant seem to wait till the next page then the next chapter. That’s my life. There is always something to be cautious about,curious about,looking forward to,happy about and brabrashit!!! Ive mastered this art and hence am barely caught off guard.
Ill not advise anyone. I still haven’t figured my shit out. I know what i want but before then i don’t want to pressure myself to the point where am loosing the small detail of life. To be happy and die happy. I don’t know when ill die but for sure i don’t even care. Even if it was tomorrow. Ill still be glad as long as i lived a happy life
Remember to live your life & Be happy…..